Just to feel better

Just to feel better

i'll do anything to feel better
pretend you are still here
i'm sick and you're with the nurses
no reason to shed grieving tear

take a sleeping pill
when my mind is asleep
it can't think of you
and drown in it's own weep

write a fantasy tale
the princess gets her white knight
spend hours writing the words
so i forget about your heavenly light

drink to the bottom of the vodka
i know mommy is bad
a little time to escape
the feelings of being mad

watch movie after movie
get swarmed in someone else's misery
forget you aren't in your crib sleeping
escape the fact you were taken from me

the world is a fogged haze
i can't find my way
you were my guiding light
the reason for my every day

i sit in a dark corner
if i don't live i don't see
all you could of been
all you were to be

i spend days in false positives
pretend i did all i could for you
reality slaps me in the face
and i know there was more i could do

hop from one place to another
moving takes up time i have to spare
the time i would of spent
on your needs, love, and care

hit the internet to shop
there's no money but i don't care
it helps the pain for an hour
helps me forget you're not there

turn off the phone
hide away in the newest escape
forget I've lost my baby boy
forget my heart's tattered scrape

go further in debt, sleep away a day
fall down the stairs tipsy, buy a new sweater
TYTY i will do just about anything
just to feel better

i miss you so much TYTY mommy misses you so much baby boy