We give thanks for you TyTy

Thank you TyTy This picture says enough without words. We miss you TyTy! Thank you for the little footsteps of love you left behind.
Nothing made you happier than sitting in between your two brothers. You looked up to them so much. 103 temp and you look like someone handed you the moon. I admire you TyTy
There is a big smile under that blanket. We miss you TyTy
Boys will be boys. Another one of my favorites. Your eyes can still melt my heart. This is a good picture. It captures exactly what it was like that day.
What a sneaky and onery looking smile. :)
Got the bottom out of one of the cups you were playing with. lol I love this picture and it is one of my favorites of you three. One of these days I will crop it and get it blown up. You were all three so happy that day. You had to spend too much time apart.
Smile through tears on this picture. You are smiling so sweet. I miss you so much TyTy. Your eyes were looking right at me. I know you look sick but that makes the smile worth even more. What an incredible spirit you are.
You were laughing so hard at Big brother Dylan. I look at this picture a lot because it reminds me of how the little things always made you the happiest. You really loved the little world you had to live in. It helps me hope that even though the world was small to you it was still enough to fulfill your two years.
This makes me laugh. You and those darn cups lol
At the end of the day those cups were tore down into the circles that make the bottom of the cup and you and your brothers used them as frisbies. I feel we really did make the best of the situation that day. In all the hustle a family goes through it's so easy to think you are weak and not linked together, but that day I knew we were. I was proud of us.
You have such a sweet smile in this picture. You were so content and happy just to sit on that couch with us all day.
If I had known those cups would of entertained you so much I would of bought a pack of them before then. lol You three had so much fun with those that day.
We're all goofing around and having fun. You look so tired and sick but you were sooo happy that day Tyler.
You played and played with those cups and yes someone got momma crying as she looked at you play. That day my heart wanted to know why, and I guess it will always want that.
Playing on the computer with mommy and Dylan. You loved watching people play the computer.

Thanksgiving
Well, where to begin with where we were last year at this time. (All pictures are from last year's Thanksgiving on the BMT ward of Iowa City) We were planning on going home the next day, like every other holiday in that last year. We ordered a dinner from Hy Vee, and planned on having dinner at the hospital. It had been weeks since we seen the boys, and we just wanted you guys together. We were all so tired and worn from the months in the hospital, and so scared we were gonna lose you. I had gotten stuff to make rice krispies, tupperware bowls to put the food in, pop, we got movies, we carried everything up to that room. Through the sky way, through the hallways, to the room, and when we walked in Sara (your wonderful nurse who made it a wonderful day for us, and I thank her so much for being so wonderful to us that day. She was so busy, but she still took all the time in the world with us.) turned around, and I seen the culture bottles. My heart broke, and I wanted to cry, I knew you had spiked, but I kept going. She said I'm sorry I wanted this so bad for you guys, and they all did. They all worked so hard to get him home every holiday, but the reality was our son was sick, and he wasn't getting better, and it didn't matter what holiday was happening. We were losing our son. He spiked a very high temp and he did his normal effects of not being able to breathe, got red, and would fall into a quiet time of just looking around. It happened every time. I was bound and determined to just go with what we were given. I knew we were losing you TyTy, I knew this would be one of our last times as a family, so I went to the rossi room we had, and I made rice krispie treats in their kitchen. Stirred it with a straw I found because I didn't think about buying utensils through all of it. I came back, and we just started doing what we would at home. The kids were going back and forth, and you were watching them carry on. Dads and I were getting the table set, and you and the boys played with Xmas cups, and were having fun, and it changed. You had a 103 degree temp your face so red, and I stopped and looked, and you had this HUGE smile on your face. You felt like crap, but you were happy just being with us. Watching what we all wished we could of had every day of your life. Normal family chaos. We took pictures, you played with those cups, and laughed and giggled at your brothers, and played with them on the computer. Dr. Radhi came in and seen us taking a picture, and you were smiling, and he couldn't believe you were smiling when you had such a high temp and so sick. We had our turkey, our rice krispie treats, talked with our nurse Sara (who was so busy but took the time to talk to us and see if we needed anything, she was wonderful that day) James kept sneaking in for Rice krispie treats, and we watched a movie and took pictures, watched you smile and beam just being around us and caught up in the family being together after so long of being apart. Nothing will ever capture beauty like your smile that day. We made the most of that day, or I feel we did, and I can only hope you felt that way.
That day we knew in our hearts you were gonna leave us, but for that one day we pretended we weren't having our last Thanksgiving. I was proud of my whole family that day. Proud we could still give each other the smiles and comfort through one of the roughest times of our life. We aren't a perfect family, but that day I felt like we were unstoppable. Even with you in heaven... I still feel that way.
I'm trying really hard to keep our family going through the next couple of months, months that not only are gonna be hard because of holidays, but because these were the last months a year ago we spent with you. My heart is in constant hurt, but I'm hoping I can hold us up. So please when you look down, and you see us smile know our smiles would be bigger if you were here. Celebrating will never be the same, and I wish with every piece of my heart and soul you were here TyTy. My heart still breaks, please look down on us as we try to get through these holidays without you. Give momma the strength to get our family through this, because living without you is the hardest thing we've ever had to do. We love you TyTy.
As we sit down to our table with one less person this year we are thankful that we had the two years with you that we did, because what you left behind from that two years wouldn't be worth living without either, and that is the spirit and love we all got from you. We love and miss you TyTy. We give thanks with very heavy hearts, but hearts full of you TyTy.