Only When I Breathe

The scary face you would do to make mommy laugh! It still makes me laugh TyTy!

Only When I Breathe

You're gone
we can't deny it anymore
weeks have gone by
you haven't crawled across the floor

Your crib is empty
the dent for which you lay
has come back to form
I noticed today

The swing stands still
no music to sing along to
no blankets to sneak and wash
to get back to the hands of you

No big sweet eyes
looking to me for touch
oh how I long for your arms
to reach for me so much

No toys to clean
none have been dropped on the floor
I guess the hidden germs
just dont matter anymore

No little outfits to wash
oh TyTy my heart is aching so
outfits you wore from birth
because your body was too weak to grow

No bottles to sterilize
remember how I used to boil them dry?
the smoke alarm would always ring
I could hear you thinking, mom why do you even try?

Every song on the radio
everywhere I look and everything I do
Every single place I go
brings me a memory of you

My heart is full of emotion
the pain begins to slowly seethe
when they ask me when it hurts the most
my response TyTy is only when I breathe